The stock market is in the tank and interest rates are so low you can hear savers and retirees weep.
It’s time for motivated capitalists to embrace the latest money-making scheme out there: green tech.
Venture socialism is new to a lot of people, so here’s what you don’t need:
- Your own money
- A viable business plan
- A competitive product
- A clue about business
And here’s what you do need:
- A connected Democrat
The Obama Administration has made plenty of Federal dollars available for the ‘right’ project. Or left project, to be pedantic but accurate. All you need to qualify for your share in billions of stimulus bucks is a successful Democrat campaign fund-raiser, or even better, a relative of a well-placed Democrat elected official. Legal resident status is preferred, but probably not required.
Tip: for best results, use arty pictures and talk about 'green jobs'
If the idea of free money for weak tech appeals to you, model your application around the same framework as these recent winners for fun and profit:
- Ronald Pelosi is an executive with a private equity group invested in SolarReserve, a green tech firm blessed with over $700 million from the Dept. of Energy. Ronald Pelosi is ex-Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s brother-in-law. Of course, that’s just a weird coincidence.
- George Kaiser of Solyndra famously blew over a half a billion Federal dollars on his solar panel boondoggle. Kaiser was a successful fund-raiser for the Obama 2008 campaign and the White House lobbied the OMB for swift approval of the Solyndra loan guarantees.
Act now, offer ends November 2012.
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In that case it IS too good to be true. Reality check: “ALMOST in the mail”.
[...] Venture Socialism [...]
I suggest you do like I did. Go to the best connected Democrat. El leader, who is the CEO of the numero uno rated firm in venture socialism, Obama incorporated, known in elite circles as O inc. O inc has unlimited funds provided by the U.S. Treasury, and it’s subsidiary, America.
I have applied for replacement of all the old solar panels on my boat. New, more efficient ones will reduce global warming. My lobbyist says the check is almost in the mail. This is almost too good to be true.